You Healed My Heart


To Richard, the only one on earth who understood me.

Please let me heal your broken heart like you healed mine when you adopted me.

You adopted me when no one else wanted me. They said I was unpredictable and unadoptable because I bit people. I was too much of a liability to be adopted out. 

Yes, I know they said I was mean, vicious and couldn't be trusted but you, Richard, saw it wasn't anger driving me to bite. It was fear. 

You taught me how to trust a human being again. You were my world. When you left us every morning to go to work I begged you to stay home. I didn't want anything to ever happen to you, to be lost to me, to leave me behind. 

I knew the exact time you were coming home. My anxiety lessened the closer you got because I knew you weren't leaving me. I would listen intently for the car door to close and then I would start my bark of joy. You were home!  Once home I was your shadow, your constant companion.

You treated me like the dog I was meant to be. A trusted, loyal family member in spite of my sketchy background and my mistakes that continued to the day I was called to the bridge.

You were the best friend a dog could have because you gave me unconditional love. You never gave up on me even when you tried to kiss my head, and I regressed and nipped your nose and it bled. You didn't even yell but I know I hurt you.

You never stopped picking me up when I asked to be picked up even though I could be like Jekyl and Hyde. But you wanted to have me sitting next to you on the couch. You were my cuddle buddy and my rock. 

I remembered all of these things as I tried my best to be brave and to hold on because your tears were falling. You weren't ready for me to go. You held me gently begging me to hold on for just another day.

But the light was beckoning me, coming closer. Other images swept past me as I remembered how forgiving you were even though I marked everywhere. You just invented things that protected the floors and furniture and put up gates throughout the house joking we lived in a gated community because you knew I couldn't help myself.

Your tears turned into sobs as you held me. The light was even brighter than before. I started smelling something that I knew would taste delicious if I could get closer. I could hear something beautiful, too, in the distance, calling me. It sounded  like a whisper and felt like a comforting gentle breeze.

I gazed into your eyes and you saw what I needed from you before I left this world. Reassurance that you would be okay without me by your side. You gently whispered to me, you released me. You said it was okay to let go. I understood and relaxed my body, my heart slowed down and I let go. I was so sad to leave you but I knew we would meet again. You will see.


Mr. Max

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